The following are questions asked by students and answered by the guiding teacher at Universal Door Meditation Center in Houston, Texas.

Why do people come to practice meditation?

Most people come because something is wrong or they have doubts about themselves. There is some sort of problem that keeps coming up in their life. There is some sort of suffering, maybe something like anger, fear, sadness, jealousy, worry, anxiety or sickness, that happens throughout their daily life and they want to find out why.

What are the common problems that students have when they come to practice?

Most people already know they have some kind of suffering that keeps happening or they have doubt about themselves, but they don’t know how to get through it.  They don’t know what to do or how to deal with it.  Despite their efforts to deny, escape or cover it up, the problem keeps happening. They feel stuck. They look for help to find out the real source of it.

I always thought meditation was a way to improve our life, to bring more peace and ease so we can continue our daily life with as much joy and spaciousness as possible. My life is good – I have much to be grateful for. I just want to make it a little better.

If you are looking for something to make you feel more happiness without first finding out why you are unhappy (or less-than-happy enough), your search will never end and you will continue to seek and grab things, people and activities in an effort to increase happiness until you are too exhausted to continue. If you look inside and realize what is blocking your full happiness, only then you will have it. But if you continue to just try to grab and fill up with more happiness, it is never enough. Deep inside, despite even physical comforts and a successful lifestyle, there is still the feeling of not enough, not perfect, could be better, not worthy enough, never fully satisfied, can’t stop getting “more”. If we continue to go out and try to satisfy ourselves, we add more activity but the imperfection persists and so we continue to increase speed until a major problem happens in mind and/or body. Is it time to step off this wheel before it is totally out of control and find out why enough of our favorite things is never enough?

OK, so now what?

Look at the feeling you have right before you reach for the thing you think will make you happy. The feelings of restlessness, anxiety, irritation or worry …. How is it? What does it feel like? Uncomfortable? What feelings happen when you can’t get what you want? What feelings happen when something happens out of your control or beyond your capacity to manage it easily? Stay in that feeling and ask yourself if this is suffering. Do you have suffering? This feeling is the result of not getting the permanent happiness we want, and the very quest for more happiness creates more of the feelings of restlessness, anxiety, worry… the feelings of suffering.

But there seem to be some people who usually get what they want and can be OK with whatever they have or don’t have.

Look more carefully and honestly in there. When you are very sick, or someone close to you is very sick, how do you feel? When you or someone close to you becomes old, fragile and failing, how do you feel? What about when someone dies? Can you feel the feeling of anxiety, fear, sadness, loneliness at that time? Without exception, everyone will feel sick sometime, grow older, and one day will die. This is suffering.

What is the main point of the teachings?

We help students go back to see and admit their anger, fear, sadness, etc. and to know that this is suffering. They continue to look, check and review their suffering more clearly to find out more about it.  Where does it come from… outside you or inside you? Why does suffering happen? What and who makes you suffer?

How do I know this practice will help me?

After you look back and review to know clearly you have suffering, where suffering comes from and why it happens, your life will change right away.  You will no longer look outside and blame anyone or anything else for your suffering.

How soon do I see the results when I start to apply this practice?

The more clearly you know your suffering, the easier it will be for you to investigate more about it.  From there you will experience the difference immediately.

When is the best time to start to practice?

Usually people wait to practice because they still have many ways to run away from, excuse, deny, or seemingly control their suffering. Because of this they think they can handle their suffering and so they continue their way until it builds up into something big and they are stuck. But at that time it may be too overwhelming for them to start practice. Therefore, it is best to start right now, to look back and check to know that you have suffering.  If so, begin to find out why. There will never be a better time to start because we never slow down or give ourselves the “free time” or the “better situation” that we hope for in order to start.

Is it really possible to end the suffering?

Everything depends on you.  If you know you have suffering and you want to know why, it is possible. When you investigate enough to truly realize the source of your suffering, the repeating pattern of suffering will end.

Is there such a thing as too old, too young or too many problems to practice? Does it matter what religious, ethnic or other background characteristic a person has?

From whatever situation that a person starts with, if they admit they have suffering and they want to find out why, they can practice.

There is someone close to me who has a lot of problems and is really having a hard time. I want to help but whatever I do and say doesn’t seem to help. This situation has been very hard on me. What can I do?

Do you see any problems or suffering in yourself when you try to help others but the result is not what you want or not good enough? If you see that suffering seems to always happen in yourself and you want to find out why, first begin to look and back and check within until you are sure you have suffering. Continue to investigate your suffering to find out more about it until you realize exactly why you suffer. Then, from your own experience, you will know how to help others without creating more problems.

What advice do you have for someone who is new to this practice?

Do you have suffering? Do you want to find out why? If so, begin.  Look back and check the feeling of suffering to find out more.  The more you investigate, the more you will see clearly where it comes from, and what and who makes you suffer. There is a very clear, constant mechanism, a system of suffering, perpetually running within us. This can be realized and the suffering can end.

This teaching seems to focus on oneself and I have responsibilities like family and work that make me busy enough. How can I have time to look back at my suffering? And I feel so selfish to focus on myself.

After we admit our suffering, and are clear about our intention and the way to review our suffering as was taught, we can do so in every situation throughout normal everyday life. When you truly know you have suffering, you can’t wait until there is “free time” to work with it because the suffering continues to happen every moment in your life. If we do not begin to work with our suffering, we just continue to bring our anger, jealousy, fear, worry, etc. into every situation and every person we touch, creating more problems day by day. When we admit our suffering and begin to investigate to find the source of it, we start to change. We no longer blame or try to control people or things outside us. Is this selfish?

I noticed on your website that there seems to be a focus on problems and suffering … knowing them, admitting them, and reviewing them. Isn’t that one-sided, missing the positive things in life?

We all want to have happiness for ourselves and the people around us. But we always think happiness is the result of this person or thing giving us what we want. That is why we always go outside ourselves to get more of what we want, what we believe, what we think will bring us happiness. The truth is that inside ourselves we have a lot of anger, sadness, and worry every moment. Why do these happen? Are they the result of what we believe, what we hold and what we want—which has constantly satisfied us in the past—but now if something does not happen the way we want we react strongly to not getting what we want, hold and believe? If we see this, we will know that it is suffering. Unconditional happiness is the automatic result of realizing the system of suffering.